Dear Anonymous,

After mulling this over for a couple days I've come up with this: you totally missed the point of my post.

The point was that the person my friend and I were dealing with was supposedly an experienced dominant. And as such he should know that novices such as my friend and I were in no position to consent to what actually happened. It is the ethics of it that are in question. It matters not what I thought or she thought about whatever relationship was or wasn't there.

The point is that as a more experienced person, he knew the protocol and ignored it. It isn't right to not provide safewords for a first session. It isn't right to make a person feel like safewords shouldn't be used once they are given. It should be encouraged for a person to use their safewords and not make them feel guilty about it.

I also found it quite interesting to note that while I was encouraged to read several books and broaden my knowledge of the subject, my friend was given the exact opposite advice and told that the exact same books really wouldn't help her. Makes you wonder, doesn't it?